Pain and pain ..

ARgh !! Forget to call Mei Yii !! Asked for her number from Liz .. and now i actually too bz infront of com till i forget to pick up the phone and start dialing the number .. oh wait a sec ... where is Mei Yii's number ?? *searching ... * Ooh .. found it .. hahahha. I havent even attend to any CG till now. Was about to ask her .. is there any CG this coming Friday, the April Fool's day and KBU Prom Nite. Dun look at me.. i never go to the prom k .. y ?? coz ..No Date =) Simple .

=7 I still having stomach ache .. guess i really ate something wrong 2 days ago .. I was in the house for whole day, never go college, the stomach seems bother me alot. It actually makes me woke up in 3am and rush to toilet. Took medicine, and seems is working so far. I really cant trust the canteen food anymore. It seems extra nutricious... Eeww !!

My Knee still pain... 2 days !! just a small lil bball will actually makes my knee KO for 2 days .. this is super nice. When only i can get my operation done ?? When only my parents will bring me to the doc and fix my stupiak knee cap ? Oh well .. mom says ...I still can walk, so dun give any prob to my dad anymore.. Yeah, i can walk, but i cant run, i cant jump .. Mom noes bout my knee cap is really need an operation to get it fix, yet she thinks bout money prob .. Oh c'mon ! give me a break, just use my medical insurance.. Erk !!!

Crap .. blogspot down and make me delay my post .. stupiak blogspot ..wat happen to u ?

End of my sports life ?

Alrite .. is really boring and i still here monitoring hitz.fm and xfresh chatroom. Guess what, is still raining now, and is the 5th day that rain adi .. hehee pretty cool and pretty cold by now. Which is still raining at 11.41pm.

Oh well, jump to the court and running here and there, jump for rebound and so on .. =) That is bball that i talking about. Is always nice to be in the court and jump and dunk the ball for points. Extreme hot today and i was really off form. Other than scoring 4 points, 4 blocks and 1 assist .. i really dun get the bit of the game, if compare to last week. Which i score 7 points, 2 assits, 4 blocks as well. BUt what i experience is .. my knee !!! Darn it !! Is getting more and more serious, and abit of running and jumping around will just make my knee got pain ? This is really gonna be end of my sports life. I retired since 18 .. and i make a come back on 20 .. now i haf to retired again ?? sigh .. i might to do so ... if i got no choice.

mk is still sad .. but somehow i believe that i cheer her up again, even thou i think i make her cry while chatting in icq. The long prayer of mine, which i really crying for upset .. and praying for her. I type it out .. and I guess i touched her .. and she cried.. at least that is wat she told me. =) She wont lie, that is what i can be sure of it. As usual, after she go offline, i called her for the 1st time after so long. Been few months since we have a good long talk over the phone. Making her laugh again and while she start calling me as "doink" and say me as "mengada" i noe she is back =). At least a moment of talk and agreed on goin out for a movie, the reminds of the last time we went out which happen last year, will brings back her laugh. I got my shoe stuck at the carpet of the cinema in KLCC, the jumping out from chair from her.. and not to forget the tasty chocolate mint pretzels. =) sweet memories, well, try to meet her up as soon as possible.

God, thank you for cheering mk up again Lord. Father she still having her probs in her mind, Lord dun mind just cont to guide her and help her Lord. I commit her to Your hands Father, Bless her, comfort her give her a hug to ease her sadness and stress Lord. I thank you Lord for letting me be a brother of her Lord that i can share her prob as well Lord. Father, I thank you Lord for everything .. and i pray all this Lord, i commit all this Lord, in Jesus most wondeful name .. Amen !!

Lone Ranger

Hmm . Lets start those happy stuff .. If not i gonna get complain that this blog is seriously Blueee ..

Have u watch Robots ??? Hehe if u havent, u better go grab a seat in the Cinema to watch it =D Is one of the nice show that is shown recently. Today was suppose to have full day class, yet end up as all class cancel and wondering y should i wake up and rush myself. Oh well .. show starts at 13.20.. and =7 miss the front part .. thanks to my frens that stuck at snooker center at 1u. Anyone up for the Robots ? I dun mind to watch the 2nd time neway. =D

Alrite .. lets back to the main topic .. Lone Ranger .. I'm so gonna get smack from ppl .. but let me explain 1st la k ? =) Is been long long time ago that i used the name. I called myself that last time, due to when i was in F1, i go everywhere alone, eat alone, walk alone this and that. Then after that i improve my social life.

Somehow ... In college, i still a lone ranger.. I cant cope with my classmate, sometimes is just cant bear with their attitude and so on. Looks like i have frens in class, yeah .. the 8 person class include me (sigh). But actually, none of them can really can say is my fren .. maybe 1 .. Pathetic rite? Ppl will alwiz ask me, "y dun u go yum cha or watch movie with them?" Good question... I hardly go out with them is all because 2 diff interest. They prefer to play snooker or even smoke, which I dun like at all.. esp smoking! Secondly, is very wasting time to walk with them, sometimes they can actually walk for few hours in 1u for nothing, and just wait for the particular time to reach, just like today. If not, keep on comment bout those gals that walk pass. =7 i just feel weird goin out with them .. So basically .. m a lone ranger in college... .. ... there is no one is same interest with me... =7

But look at the other hand, i do have lots of frens around me, like in church and in Cf, tons of them. So, i dun really care bout the small potion of "frens" that take advantage all the time. =) For those who reading this, u noe who u are as my frens that i really mean it. =) So i wont mention who are u .. hehe Cheers ..

Btw .. Mk and Cherrie . both my sis, dun sad anymore k =) hehe I glad that i able to cheer both of u all up, at least u are not that sad anymore. =D that actually maintain my record of cheering ppl up as 100% since year 2001. God grant me the ability of caring =D Yay !!

Huh ? What ??

BLah ... raining the whole day and that is the main faktor that makes me so so sleepy by now.. and is only 9.39pm. Erm .. that is the time that i actually log-in into blogspot.com and start running my fingers on the ergonomic keyboard and place my hand on the optical mouse. *Picks up the mouse* Loooook Ma !! No TaiL ~! =P

The rain start pouring down to this maroon color earth .. since afternoon, when i was about to nap .. hahahha.. lazy me.. =P cant blame me, coz the weather is so so comfy, just makes me felt like slide into my bed and plant my head on the pillow .. and .. ZZzzzZz .. ... .. ... ...

Wear total black to Church, long sleve, double layer and i pull my zip til the neck, so i can protect my lungs getting cold. But most of the time during the service, i cover my nose as well, the hall is too cold, and esp on this cold weather raining day. Hazel looked at me .. and she said she can only recognized my hair style .. hahaha =P guess I cover off half of my face is look like .. erm ..weird or ..stalker or something like that. At least i noe few person ask me y .. and .. u noe =) imagine if u see someone like that .. what would u ask ? Heh but i really need to cover my nose .. incase my nose got so active and start running around .. erm . that means .. running nose =7.

Hehhe I dint noe i still look young .. =P i thought those was history of mine. But guessss what .. This is what happen today .. in Dream Cafe, RLC.

Mei Yii : Have u start ur college yet ?
Me : I start my college long time ago adi .. *smiles*
Mei Yii : *confuse* How old are you actually ?
Me : I think m the eldest among u all ..
Mei Yii : *looks confuse*
Me : I actually 21 soon ...
Mei Yii : *Supprise* har ? I thought u same age with me ... so that means u are 2 years older?

Hahaha I never thought i look like 18 =P hehe i take it as compliment .. hehehe I noe i alwiz been claim as having a babyface .. yet i dint noe that it last till now. =P But at least i still look young. *Beaams* Heheh I guess other than kryz, liz and tian an .. others duno how old am i .. =) Hui yii never tought as well .. Mei Yii thought i was same age with her .. coz she said .. she heard about ET fetch the Cf ppl here and there .. fetch liz or anything .. hehehe thats y she thought it wrong .. =) WEll .. that makes my day happy .. u wont want to noe how u feel when ppl say u older actually =P at least i dun like it.

Cheeeeers .. Mei Yii is blur ~! *grins*

Good Friday wei !!

Is Good Friday !!!! U hear me ?? Is Gooood Friday !! Lets Partaaaay !! =P energetic in here .. but real life condition is .. X_X .. y ? hahah u wanna noe ?? Coz .. Slight Fever + Backache + Left knee swollen + right feet pain + dizzy + headache .. =P

Just back from FGA not long ago ..around 2 hours like dat. Was there late .. and Ps. Andrew(Deeper In Love 2005 Speaker) is giving talk .. hard to concentrate on my condition .. so basically .. remember bout alter call .. anything more ? ooh yea !! The short edit passion of Christ is shown. =) But most of the scene dun dare to watch . the slashing and the nailing part .. =( dun think i can take those .. feel so hurt .. and .. obscene.

Today stay back after Cf (as usual) then practice the act for Easter Rally . Smoker .. hmm .. not really hard for me . just act like . i was there .possing(eew !!) and act as cool .. (?!) and pretend smoke (honestly i hate smoke). I love acting .. and i believe that i am not that weak in acting part =) yet i love dancing as well.. hehehe . Oh well .. end up later become the part time Jesus .. so that they can cont the acting ... =( and that is the hard wan .. coz i dunno wat i suppose to do .. hehe but i guess after that i getting into it .. but then =( sakit la my knee .. "ter"fall on the ground too hard .. and mua knee scratch ~ (ouch !!)

Hahah Kiat Yee having the same hp with me .. =P rare type .. nowadays can see ppl holding my motorolla c350 .. hehe supprise with that neway. I love my phone neway, even tho is outdate .. but still cool =) Motorolla .. Yay !!

BLessss Mei Yii, Tian An, Liz, Ee Wen and those who start blogging back again ..ehehe at least i got some place for me to read =P or spam the chatbox .. or comment box also !! *grins at liz*

Love Stuck ..

Love stuck for this time .. I guess most of the ppl noe who i like .. Honestly, like is still like, it doesnt mean love. Love, is a very deep meaning word for me. Is only use on my gf or someone that I really love. I dun simply love ppl, yet i just admire ppl and like them. Basically, i like someone, then i migh take action. But most of the time i just kept to myself. I just dun feel like telling out or confess, y ?? Is all because the nitemare still haunts me.

Harum semerbak kasturi indah mewangi
Cantik rupa parasnya puteri di sinar maya
Cinta bukannya semata yang ku perlu zahirmu
Hey... yeah... yeah...
Puteri... ohh...

Kini kau tiada lagi tinggallah aku sendiri
Rindu di hati ku ini tak dapat aku sembunyi
Entah bila kan kembali
Setelah kau pergi oh...

Puteri... malam ku dingin tiada pujuk rayumu
Kembalilah... ku kehilangan tawa mesramu itu
Ohh puteri... malam ku dingin aku kehilanganmu
Kembalilah... mengertilah oh kekasihku
Ohh... puteri ku

Dengarkanlah rayuan (hati)
Tak sanggup aku kehilanganmu
Di dalam jaga aku keliru
Ohh... mengertilah

Kembalilah
Malam ku dingin tiada pujuk rayumu
Puteriku...
Ku kehilangan tawa mesramu itu
Kembalilah...
Malam ku dingin aku kehilanganmu
Kekasihku... mengertilah oh kekasihku... ohh...

Kekasihku... kembalilah...

Is Puteri from Zainal Abidin... I just used it by now to express a lil feeling of mine. I miss u by now, the gal that i like. I just stop sms and call. Which i actually think that after i confess, u try to avoid me, maybe im not maybe what i think is correct. U ask me to move on and dun haunt by nitemares. But yet, I guess is happen again. A new nitemare. Who knows ? I really miss the time that we get to chat for very long. 3 hours plus on phone, after then i never get that chance to haf that nice talk. U seems avoiding my call and etc. Not even a sms been reply. U might run out of credit. But when talking on phone.. u put down the phone before i get to say bye to u. Is very hurt.

I might noe u not long, and I really want to noe u more, but seems the door been shut tight. I scare that if i take u as my gf, i will hurt u, coz i dunno that will i take u as a rebound by now. I want to make sure is a real feeling of mine, and not love in 1st sight or a crush. Definitely not having a gf jus for the sake of having it. I'm not those playboy type, when i get into a relationship, i will take it very serious.

I noe, I am a workeholic. I alwiz put the work as the top priority. I will more concern on all my frens and my pet sis than my own gf. I am not a romantic person as well. I guess, this is the reasons that i actually can't get a gf. GUess no one can stand that. Sounds not fair rite ? But this is an imperfect world.

Sigh ... Love .. is really a hard game to play. Thought it was easy, but i am wrong ..Guess .. lets be frens 1st .. no nit to rush ..

Welcome to my life ..

Hmm .. today just went to Cherrie's house ... one of my sis, incase u guys and gals out there think the wrong thing.Help her to check bout her com .. and we went to BK to had light lunch or snack. Went to Glad Sounds to get the Planet Shakers CD for herself. I drop by her house once again, and her 2 lil dawgie seems to be misbehave. Fifi and Hercules jumping up and down around me.. Fifi was quite ok .. yet Hercules seems non stop hugging my leg, bark at me and even sneeze at me .. =7 Moments later .. Fifi start licking my pants .. makes me wonder there is something in my pants, other than the wallet and handphone .. Argh ! I smells like dawgie after i left her house.

Life is roller coaster .. up and downs .. yet .. As i said before. This is a dog eat dog world .. I seriously not happy with alot of things that happen around me. I realise that i actually no frens in the class. Frens .. is someone that is suppose to help u or wateva it is .. but what i got is those fella who actually taking advantage all the while !Wateva things I will be the victim who actually suffer and tired. Even a small lil minor things, they just planned to get advantage. This is just my life !!

Think back (again!!) I really need to change my lifestyle .. I guess in this 2005 .. is time to say bye to the old me .. That means .. i wont be that helpful again. Y ? Coz i haf too .. Look at me by now. Since when ppl wont take advantage on me... this is simply because i will never learn how to say "NO". Saying "NO" is something very hard to me. Just like what Liz and Esther says. Is nice to actually helping ppl, but i need to learn how to say "NO" to avoid being taking advantage from ppl. The 1st thing . i will be doin that to my class rite now. Watever they try to ask .. I will just say "NO" This is for what I have been treat all the while. This is bout me to show them show some respect on me. At least some respect. From time to time i trying to help any of them whenever they need, sounds nice eh ? Yeah .. nice .. nice until me myself die alone. When i need help .. there goes everyone away and bz ..if not start telling me .. aiya .. so susah la .. this and that. So by now, enuff of helping and i want to take back something that is mine and Now ! U die is ur prob .. dun try to ask me !!

Banging myself everywhere and everytime. Facing walls and spikes and junctions in my life. I have choosen this road 6 years ago. I thought it will be a nice wan .. yet is that tough which i never thought b4. GUess wat .. thinking to ask me to give up ?? Over my dead body and i will say NO! Did i just said this is the road i had choose ? So whats the point ask me to give up ? I noe this will be tough, and ET is not that fragile .. all i can say is .. Bring It On !! Is This what U can do ?? Beat me then !!

I see midst in my future, I guess i total lost my way ..Just in time .. Liz gave me a good advise .. sounds normal .. but u noe, when u really lost .. those advise is bout reminding u and is really can make an impact.

[05:45:48 PM] martian ET : =( I see mist aje la liz
[05:48:46 PM] ~a-g-a-p-e~ : pray la
[05:48:53 PM] ~a-g-a-p-e~ : be happy
[05:49:08 PM] martian ET : i try to move on from pass .. trying hard
to get rid of it
[05:49:24 PM] ~a-g-a-p-e~ : do not be anxious, but in everything by
prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your
requets unto GOd
[05:49:41 PM] martian ET : sounds very familiar
[05:49:54 PM] ~a-g-a-p-e~ : and the peace of God which transcends all
understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ
Jesus

Honestly .. thanks alot liz .. U the best, u alwiz there when i sad. I just wonder . y i noe u so late ? I hope that i can actually noe u longer. But .. thanks to the Plot of Land that bind us together and noe each other.

Tireed ...

Oh Darn !! My whole Sunday end up like dat .. Guess how many things i do from morning till evening ?? only ONE !! SATU !! 1 !!

Woke up at 8 . and go college at 9.. then i was there running up and down .. talking to the parents .. students .. and etc etc all the while .. i was doing this thing till 5pm ..but not bad . .at least get to know a gal from china .. her name is Sophie ..

Heheh actually today was my college open day .. and we was been called to help them. Assist the parents and the students to the 3rd floor, where the main thing is there. We are there if they need us to take them to look around the college. Pretty fun but extreme tired. U wont want to try that, running up and down non stop .. and standing infront of the booth for very long time

Is nice to see Ray Tat, and Erin sign up for the course today. Both of them sign up for the Art and Design. =) kewl eh ? heheh at least i spend that long talking to Ray Tat's parents is worth it neway. Erin .. hmm .. aunty Emily actually got this planned in her mind long time. So .. no supprise for me . Justin is here as well .. Justin .. anyone remembered him ? He join the AFC last time .. yet . he become very skinny .. wonder what actually happen to him .. =P i was about to forget till the mom called me . hehehhe pai seeh !

=7 If Natasha is here .. i sure spank her .. for main missed call kao kao !

Yesterday, Beatles

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away
Now it looks as though they’re here to stay
Oh, I believe in yesterday.

Suddenly, Im not half the man I used to be,
Theres a shadow hanging over me.
Oh, yesterday came suddenly.

Why she had to go I dont know she woldn’t say.
I said something wrong, now I long for yesterday.

Yesterday, love was such an easy game to play.
Now I need a place to hide away.
Oh, I believe in yesterday.

One of my fav song of all, the lyrics is suite to me, at least that is what i feel now.
Yesterday, all my troubles seem so far away, but now.. all the problems looks like has come back. Try to solve 1 .. end up more and more .. never ending.

I was so happy bout love thingy, yet now .. throug the whole year, i guess i suffer from love probs .. after break and this and that ... I really feel like getting a place for me to hide away ..

This year i changed alot, no longer the ET that everyone noes.. i turn to become more kerazee and so on .. y is that happen so ? I duno .. i guess ..... is bout my emotional ?

Eh .. "TopicLess"

Erk .. actually is getting less ppl will actually post on blog. Guess not much ppl actually online like me rite? the fella who actually 24-7 keep the line running and the CPU is running as well. OH well .. nvm .. dun criticise on me if u dunno how i work with my com.

Basically, so far wondering how many things i tryin to achieve.. at least i get noe few more person, and not to forget e2wen or ewen(sorry if i got da name wrong) that i noe from blogs .. which happen that i crawl from 1 blog to another and end up .. chat with her, in blog and in msn as well.. never noe that she from S8 last time, which same class with Evonne - My sis and also Sereen aka Babydirtbag from #hitz.fm chatroom, the official chatroom.

Get to noe Hazel(is the spelling correct?) from RLC few weeks back.. did she actually noe my name? dun think so .. argh ! nvm .. ET this name getting poluted by ppl .. Eve from Assunta called me as Ee Ling (?!) and become Itchy (?!) when intro myself to the College CG in FGA KL dat day.. Guess i really haf to change my name soon .. argh ! for so many years .. ET this name is spoiled ! Is suppose to be easy to remember and no mistake .. yet .. still happen .

Sarah, keryong and their frens that i know them few days back .. hmm .. honestly .. they dun even look like one of the f4 .. =P i thought is f2 .. guess haf to admit that nowadays .. children and kids really look young .. Erm wait .. or am i the one who actually getting older ?! ARgh ! i hate to become old ..

Hm .. congrats to my mui who actually got couple ... and those who goin to get couple .. All da best ur gor can say. For the one who got recruit to the NS service ..i wonder how are u doin by now ..God Bless u my dear.. take good care of ur legs .. Mui that is leaving to Russia soon .. I really want to hang out with you more often .. dun sad and think so much bout ur sis .. U noe, is not everyone like ur bro . that actually thinks that gf are not as important as my muis .. For another mui that is kinda lost contact .. how are u doin by now ? how is ur STPM result ?? And .. for the youngest mui .. how is the KT trip ? Nice ?

Everyone around me seems to jump around and get couple ... good or bad ? I dunno .. i just wish everyone .. all da best . and think b4 u do anything.

Double Moody

Double potion of moody.. I guess i just lost control on my emotion ..

Well, today suppose to be happy coz i can get to see Jolene in 1Utama. Yet things screwed up!! Went to CHS and help abit and end up helping in upcoming Easter Rally .. and off to 1Utama with Shane. On the way rushing ..Ruey they all actually thought i never go pick Nicholas up (?!) =7 Am I dat kind of person ? I can even run back just to pick some ppl up during the carolling ... Nvm .. no nit bother is the truth or not .. this is just my life ..Welcome the life of ET .. the more nice u try to be, the more dead and more sad u gonna be.

Reached 1Utama .. and KY left .. so now is onli, shane and me the 2 guys. My mood start goin down.. guess i not really happy with what the gals said. Pretty moody .. and just felt like go back straight away. But .. now i claim as .. my self problem. My emotional seriously not stabil at all .. Dats the reason .. I NEVER TALK TO ANYONE .. would will believe that ?? Most of the time i just quiet and walk .. and follow .. even watch show .. =7 dat is so not me .. got wat i mean ? Saw enemy of mine, which the stories is from last time .. around 2001. And .. more angry when saw him ..dun ask me to forgive them like wat the bible says .. if u were me last time, u should noe is hyper hard to do that.

Eat alone, walk alone .. basically that is how i spend my outting .. is more like i am walking alone .. I guess, the gals will think i am weird or maybe I already weird to them. Punches the wall .. which cause not much damage to my hand. Feels better .. yet .. still not stabil. What on earth actually happen to me ??? I can even shouted to my mom all of sudden .. and goin out with frens .. and I got nothing to talk ?!? Even i not even talking to anyone !! Not Talking to Jolene that i like ?!And Not even talking to Ruey or Ee Ling . My day is just bad .. BAD is not enough to explain and express what i feel now.

!Deop myself in #hitz.fm chatroom, incase i got fired up and just kick ppl's asses. That is gonna to make my day more worst.

Sometimes.. i really think that .. did that break make me go like this? Admit that i felt nothing that nite, but i cant deny that i total ok with everything. Looking around .. thinking bout my nitemares, bad memories.. every of them can just stuck me for goin anywhere. I noe i haf to move on, is like what Jolene said. I noe i haf to get rid of everything. Is time for me to gain my self-esteem. But.. is hard. I felf my life is lonely. Looks like i got lots of frens that surround me, but what did i actually need anymore? There is some part that Im not satisfied with it. But i duno which part. Goes to church, is nice to worship and praise God.. is nice to hang around with Church frens .. but once everything comes to the end .. I felt emptiness ..

Millions Dollar Baby is a nice show, that is what i watched .. plain watching, not talking .. no discussing during the show.. (weird me) I really keep myself isolate this time. Neway .. look at da story of the show. Mag seems happy with her achivement with tons ok KOs .. and basically she is a good boxer in the world .. that is wat mention in da movie. But her ending .. is dead, due to cheating from her opponent, she got injured, paralyze, lost 1 leg.. and she beg her trainer to let her die ..

I wont know will i actually become paralyze .. no one can tell. Even if the day has come, i will rather die. Watever ways i want .. watever ways i can do it. I use to be a runner, a sprinter, a soccer player, a badminton player and even a basketball player.. but look now ? What am i now ? Retired from the age of 18 ?! Suffering with tons of injures .. Cant even run properly.. cant even jump alot or sprinting .. not even can play a long game of badminton .. play basketball with no much jumping .. rather dun exercise anymore .. I really want to back to running track, back to court.. back to field and etc etc ..

I love Sprinting, I love cheering ppls up .. I love entertaint ppls .. but the truth is .. I am a clown. Smiley face around, makes ppl laugh with all sorts of lame jokes i can think bout. Wash away the paintings .. i back to myself ..facing myself .. Am a sad lonely clown ..

More Moody

14th March is a white valentine .. a fren of mine told me this while in the college. I thought it will be a good day. White valentine is the day where guys suppose to give gals choc .. Sounds nice and and kewl rite .. neway. Everything was kewl .. until Kent called .. "U noe who is Pn Tan Poay Hoon? She just passed away this morning ..... " Pn Tan ? dun think i noe who is that, nvm .. but ..sad that CHS lost another teacher.

Went back, looked into magazine .. get a shock. Chen Pei Fen ?! The another thing is .. i must be wrong ..double check the name, yeah. it is Tan Poay Hoon aka Chen Pei Fen ..a BC teacher of mine last time. She gave me lots of advice and obviously a good teacher. I still met her last year. Teacher .. just left ... tears coming out .. i noe .. there will be something bad is gonna happen, yet i never expect as bad as this. Look into my phone, scroll down the whole pile of list, trying to search someone that is from 5P3 last time .. yet, i failed to do so .. i dun hav any of their contacts .. WHAT THE ! I Couldnt believe it ! how can i jsut dun haf their numbers and esp on this kinda of time ?!

Pn Tan .. I cried in front of u .. yet can u actually see ? I couldnt stop my self been broke down right infront of u. I really respect u as a teacher of mine last time, even thou is just a short time, but what u haf teached is more than that. I will never forget the way u teach, the way u care for us. Looks fierce, but actually ur not. That nite... u was sleeping .. I was standing .. and slowly kneel down .. i mourned of the lost of u as a teacher.. but i'm glad that u are in heaven by now, rejoicing with the Lord. U left the world.. with emptiness and loneliness .. with those sweet memories .. is all bout history now, ur laughter and ur words.. are no longer been able to heard from ur mouth .. I'm sorry teacher .. u put high hope on me .. but yet i failed to achieve... I'm really sorry . I will by now, forever remember ur words that u spoke to me last time. Pn Tan .. I will see u 1 day.. 1 fine day .. i will be seeing u again.

Lord.. I really thanks for the chance that i get to noe Pn Tan as a wonderful teacher of mine. I duno will i actually like the subject if she never make it that interesting. Lord, I met her few times in school, yet i cant see the sign of her suffering from brain cancer. I noe that Lord, she has u in her mind. She believes that You will take good care of her. By now.. she haf left the world .. Take good care of her Lord, as she is now with you. How many years she had spent teaching students, and I guess now is the time for her to relax and talk to You face to face. I ask for Your favour Lord.. fill the emptiness that we feeling now, take away the loneliness, and take away the saddness of ours Lord. I thank you Lord for everything.. and I commit everything to Your hands Lord .. for You haf the wonderful plan for us. Thank You Lord .. And I commit everything to You .. I pray all things .. in Jesus name i prayed .. Amen ..

Pretty Moody ...

Pretty moody today, after i fall for her .. guess..i cant wipe her away from my mind. Bothers me days and nites. I really confuse bout my feeling by now.. is it like or admire or crush? I guess i need to noe her more and make sure that she is not a rebound for me.

I guess m actually like a clown.. y say is clown ? I guess i just there to cheer ppl up. I love cheering ppl up. Yet i get moody after that. The more i cheer ppl up, the more i get moody. How if i dun want to cheer ppl up? WilL I actually get moody ? By right is I wont feel moody.. yet the truth is .. i get mooody as well.. What can I do ? Guess i just keep to myself. Cheering ppl up.

Esther told me that she experience dat b4 as well. This is because we share problems... man .. i able to make ppl from sad to laugh their heads off.. but i can actually moody until cant do anything. This is more to extreme. Esp this few days .. my mood is seriously down. Infront of ppl, i do nothing, the smiley me and the keraze me.. but in another way round .. i will be quiet and goes with my thiking and moody again .

Went FGA KL .. join CG .. saw someone .. but never get to talk to her. Pretty bad. I dunno is no chance or coz m moody or shy .. Never figure that out. Went to SS2 and have a some sort of farewell for Josh who goin to NS. Pass him something, prayer and .. huggles .. and .. will be missing him at least 90 days.

Take Good Care dudes .. take good care josh .. God Bless u forever and ever. And God Bless u all who reading this blog as well. Jesus Loves Ya !

Happy Birthday Esther !!

OOh !! Doink ! DOink ! DOinkies !!! So many ppl birthday ~! ehhehe Actually is onli 2 .. after the kerazee elephant gal Janene.. and now .. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ESTHER !! My Beloved SIS !! =D Happy 17th Bday ! Hehe but I noe u wont be looking my blog .. but nvm neway .

hehe As usual for my blog tradition .. im gonna sing u a bday song ~

*clears throat*
Happy bday to u ~

Happy bday to u ~

Happy burpday to Estheeeer .~~ (shivering voice)
happy birthday to u~~ (totally out of tune)

Hehe lets see .. erm .. wait .. how bout Winchester Mystery House? Postponed la .. today lets talk bout ..Esther =D.

Hm .. start knowing her from icq... some convo that time, Daniel and david add her in. Start to noe her as Babyfish. Which she call me as Martian (My 1st icq nick). She gave me a shock dat time. BAck to 2001. She still a f1 or f2 gal. After that, chat with her quiet often from icq. But awhile later on lost contact, due to her hp number change and she never seen in icq anymore. But get to meet her 1 time in school after the school ends

Until i join AFC st. Paul .. during the new year eve service, someone called me "Martian?" then i look around, found this lil gal.. she look at me and point at herself saying "Babyfish". THat is how i met her back. Then from that day onwards, she calls me as martian when she saw me.

Years later.. met her in St. Paul AFC camp -- His Love is Alive. That time started to change the name she called me .. now she call me as Ben.. that is when she noe my real name =D. No more babyfish .. but Esther for her. =) Get to noe her more and more ...

The next year i fetch her back to house after Cf ...the relationship between us getting closer and closer. =) and Is happen wat u see by now, she is my beloved sis. and i still send her back when she need a transport. Been to her house alot alot of times, and yeah .. her parents noe me as well .. and of coz i noe her 2 sis .. Gwen and Zoe.

hehe is nice to noe this lil sis =D. A cute gal that u actually can play along with .. and of coz ..a very best fren that u can haf =). U will be amazed when u see her talent of dancing and acting.

And again .. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ESTHER !!

Bunnyman .. heard b4 ?

Alrite .. here I am again, to share some research. Is also a nice story =) a interesting wan. Well, no idea that any of u heard b4 the legend of the Bunnyman ? I guess most of u will give the 1 answer .. that is ----- "har?"

Oh well .. nvm .. here comes the legend .

Back in 1904, Clifton .. the convicts were gathered and piled into the bus which was to transport them to Lorton. Somehow during the drive not too far from where they left, the driver had swerved to avoid something and the bus had started to tip and soon was rolling in a terrible collision course.

Most of the convicts were injured but had managed to escape the bus and had fled into the night woods. Later on the next morning a local police investigation had begun, and they had begun rounding up the escaped convicts. Hours turned into days, days into weeks, weeks into months. Every one was recovered after 4 months, except for 2 people, Marcus A. Wallster and Douglas J. Grifon. During the search for both men the police randomly found dead rabbits half eaten and dismembered every now and then along their search.

Finally they were to find Marcus dead himself by the Fairfax station Bridge (now known as Bunny Man's Bridge). In his hand he held a man-made hammer/knife like tool, made with a sharp rock and a pretty sturdy branch as a handle. They thought nothing and cared not of how he died, only that he was apprehended and no longer had to worry about him.

They had a name for Marcus, but later on they would realize they had named the wrong person the Bunny Man.

Still searching for Douglas, they kept on finding dead half-eaten bunny's every-so-often while the search went on. Finally they were to name Douglas the Bunny Man from then on.

3 Months passed by and the police had given up their search in April 7th 1905. Everybody assumed the Bunny Man was dead by now, if not gone, so they went on with their small town lives. Come October people started seeing dead bunny's reappearing out of the blue, and starting to fear the unseen.

Halloween Night came around, and as usual a bunch of kids had gone over to the Bridge that night to drink and do whatever kids their age in the 1900's did. Midnight came around within minutes and most of the kids had left, only 3 of them remained at the bridge.

Right at Midnight supposedly a bright light back from within the Bridge, where the kids were and less than a couple seconds later they were all dead. Throats slashed with that same type of tool that was found by the other Escapee Marcus. Not only were there throats slashed, but all up and down their chest's were a long slashes gutting them. To top it off the Bunny Man hung both of the guys from one end of a bridge with a rope around their neck, hanging from the overpass with their legs dangling in front of the pass of cars.

So far, there is alot of murder that is happen b4 at the bridge, The Bunnyman Bridge of coz. Like what I haf mention earlier, this story actually is a real wan, yet all of the victims are killed and hung from the bridge.

There is another story, pretty much the same, just saying a teenager dressed up like a bunny and killed his parents on the Halloween or Easter day.. can't remember neway. But i think the convicts is more accurate which is recorded down in library. (not those at here of coz)

But both of them come together with 1 point. The bunnyman is believed that dressed up like a bunny or wearing bunnies' skin. They killed kids most of the time, and they hung them from bridge. There is a ritual, that if u go to the brigde, stand inside the tunnel and shout "Bunnyman" for 3 times, and it will appeared . Believe it or not. But for those investigators that been there, they can feel the strong feeling of death and believe that there is some activities happen at there (talking about paranormal activities). The bridge is painted bright white, which make the brigde looks weird.

Oh well . Will stop here, the next coming .. The Mystery House of Winchester *winks*

Ghost ? Spirits ? Orbs ?

*Warning!!* Pls do not cont to read if you really kenot stand anything bout Ghost, that means u very scared of Ghost. I wont take any responsibilities AT ALL.

Hmm .. i noe there is lots of ppl out there actually dun believe bout ghost, spirits and others paranormal activities. What i can say is, this is up to everyone's believe. At least i encounter it b4, few times. Thats the reason i become a ghost hunter and believe in paranormal activities.

Ghost Hunter - We are here to hunt the exisiting of ghost, and we do not bust ghost. So dun compare us with Ghost Busters. For we do not take the proton beams and shoot at ghost.

Well, i still clearly remember some encounter .. there is some level 1 contact as well, when i actually been "touched" by them. Back to when i was young, my 1st encounter of ghost, by visualize. I use to have this bed, which the botton drawer is another layer of bed. And the gap between the floor and the bottom of bed is just merely 1 or 2cm. One day, at nite, i look down to the bottom (which i love to do that.. no idea y) I saw this pair of white hand drop down.. I thought it was just a pair of gloves, yet after that, i realise, there is no gloves underneath ..

Same old house, i woke up from sleep in the midnite, i heard some marching .. yeah .. u noe the sound of the army marching, that is what exactly i have heard, and i dun even dare to look at it, i cover myself under the blanket, wait til they march over my room, then i onli dare to look up.

There is few more encouter, like i was stepping on this grave (whcih i realise later on) to snap on some nice view, my fren told me .. what i was stepping on is a grave, what was i holding on .. is the tombstone. (?!) Once the picture is developed out, i realise the ship that i try to snap is never been found in the pic, and the tombstone is in the pic (?!) Sounds weird rite ? I can tell u, that happen in 1996, Malacca.

Back to recent, i was in this camp.. (sorry for not to mention which camp and which year) I was the photographer, snap lots of pic of the camp activities. Recorded some activities as well. Nothing went wrong, but i haf to admit, i try to communicate with the spirits. But i fail, due to i never really spend time to do so. Once i back from camp, look at those pic that is been developed .. i got shock, tons of orbs appeared. Well, i decide to keep this by not telling anyone, i just explain it with .. Dust. But .. if u really noticed, the "dust" does not appear in all the pics on that nite..... believe it or not? up to u *winks*

Heheh if u guys really interested in this kinda thing ? i will consider and might post more. =D

ps: What i had sad is 100% true

Happy Birthday Janene !!

HEhehe I'm back after some time never post. =D Gues what .. today is michelle's and Janene's bday .. =P but i forget bout michelle's bday .. erm .. Not that Michelle Ng and Michelle Kin from CHS .. not Michelle Chan from Assunta.. not Michelle Chong from St.Paul .. but the Michelle from FBC. (banyak mich wei.. )

Heheh come come .. let me sing a song .. a bday to u all ..

*Clears throat and sing with William Hung style*

Happy Birthday to u...
Happy Burpsday to u ...
Happy Birthday to Mich and Janene ..
Happy Birthday to u ~~ (total out of tune way)

Heheh Got the Planet Shakers Cd - All That I Want for Janene.. got it yesterday and straight away drive to post office and tell them i need it to arrive at Segamat by tmr. Heheh as usual .. i did it b4 to mk .. and this time i did it again =D. Chunted rite ? the pos laju is really can arrive within 24 hours .. but under 1 condition .. post b4 3pm. Hehehe with the price of .. *oops * hehhe kenot tell =P . What i think is worth it neway .. hehehe.

Hehhe talking bout Janene .. a cute gal la . haha which i noe her for around 3 years by now .. starting from 2002. I noe her from camp .. coz she is that kerazee and siao siao wan . =P abit noisy neway .. Hehe then at the following days .. we are in the same camp and having outreach ..
Still remember at the shelter homes .. there is 1 lil kid .. come and drag me around .. she call herself as rabbit .. and she called Janene as Elephant =P. That lil gal is cute yet she give lots of nick names to our members .. hehehe. Never contact for some time . until last year i join log team and met Janene back. She belanja me McFlurry !! Is my 1st McFlurry .. heheh so paiseh .. she came all the way from Segamat yet she belanja me .. hahahhaha

Oh well .. Happy BIRTHDAY TO JANENE AND MICHELLE !!

:: Playing - Planet Shakers : Perfect Day ::